And that'll be that

Which is sadder:

1) The fact that 4chan is slower on Saturday nights

--or--

2) The fact that I know that 4chan is slower on Saturday nights?

4chan Party Van Shuts Down Glitterpie

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE - New York, NY

In what bloggers are calling a shocking upset, those familiar with the situation report that Glitterpie has just been shut down by the 4chan Party Van.  Operatives from CColon Labs are monitoring the situation and will provide updates as conditions warrant.  

More starbursts than a candy store

I am greatly amused by Chrysler's latest viability plan.  Not because the charts and graphs are sexy, but because the layout looks like it was done by a fifth grader. They might as well have used Comic Sans as the font.  

Your company is drowning. Your job and the jobs of tens of thousands of others are on the line. You've had over two months to prepare a plea for help. So you slap together a PowerPoint with as many graphs, pictures, circles, and arrows as possible. Throw in a few American flags to stir up misplaced patriotism. What the hell were they thinking? This sort of "presentation" would be a seppuku-worthy offense at most corporate outfits. At least they didn't use crayons.  

A list

Here is a list of search phrases I thought would return an empty set (i.e., 0 results), and the number of Google hits as of this posting:

“lolcats are a higher form of humor” – 0 hits

“influential labiatarian” – 0 hits

“rednecks are too civil” – 0 hits

“eats cats for breakfast” – 606 hits

“Hannibal was a great guy” – 3 hits

“all the smart people are on myspace” – 0 hits

“works for slashdot” – 80 hits

“the girls at the office” – 6,240 hits

“the high-priced girls at the office” – 0 hits

“the apple community is too blasé” – 0 hits

“tattooed loldog” – 0 hits

“avril lavigne is an extremely talented” – 7 hits

“jeff lebowski is a hard worker” – 0 hits

“high-definition vodka” – 0 hits

“can’t find any porn on the internet” – 8 hits

“gentlemen prefer slashdot” – 0 hits

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